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  1. #11
    Senior Member Arrived RTB's Avatar
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    Feb 2012


    I go by the rules the majority of the time. The only thing I fudge is with the local library. They lump 4-8 together and 9-12. My 8 year old is just too old to make a paper bag puppet. She wants to make the cool tween stuff. When she has done stuff with her age group, she is by far the oldest so it is no fun for her.
    DS 15, DD 13
    Year 9

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  3. #12
    Senior Member Arrived skrink's Avatar
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    Oct 2010


    I tend to go in the other direction. Dd is both small for her age AND young for her age, and although she wouldn't be happy in a group of littles, if there is a cut off and she's just over the line I will put her in the younger group. I always check with the powers that be first, though, just because I think it's only fair.

    I have acquaintances who always put their children in the older group. We had an activity this past month for incoming high school age students. Since it was a high interest activity for dd, and she does fit the age group, we signed her up. One mom signed up her NINE yo. That irritates me no end. This is a woman who graduates all of her children by age 14 though, so I guess it fits. The kid was bored and wanting to leave, but he was stuck. So much of this is parent ego.
    Skrink - mama to my 14 yo wild woman

  4. #13


    With our local co-op I'm more likely to try to stick Teemie in the younger age group. She's tall for age, but also has reading difficulties and bonded with a bunch of kids a year or two younger anyway. So going with the younger group usually keeps her with her friends and a lower expectation on reading and writing.
    Teemie - 11 years old, 6th grade with an ecclectic mix

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  5. #14
    Senior Member Arrived TFZ's Avatar
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    Mar 2015
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    I have no prob if your kid is placed in a different class. Most of the stuff we sign up for is on the honor system. We experience the opposite in the little kids age group stuff. Not looking forward to it especially this time of year. We do the kids activities marked 5 and under, and we see the older brothers and sisters that areally 7, 10, huge. I don't care if they come to sit at a music class, for example, but it's a pain in the ass when there is a giant ten year old boy swinging around the open gymnastics and landing right next to my 2yo.
    Last edited by TFZ; 06-06-2016 at 10:56 AM.
    I'm a work-at-home mom to three, homeschool enthusiast, and avid planner fueled by lattes and Florida sunshine. My oldest is 6 and is a fircond grader (that's somewhere between first and second, naturally), my preschooler just told me she wants to learn how to read, and my toddler is a force of nature.

    I gather all kinds of secular homeschool resources and share them at

  6. #15


    Yeah, I think stay with your age. I agree with the previous posters that said as much. Nuff said.
    Homeschooling two sons (14 and 16) from day one. Atheist.
    Eclectic, Slackschooler covering 8th and 10th grades this year.

  7. #16


    I had a situation when I signed DS up for a physics class that was for 11+. He was 13 going on 14 so I thought the middle school level was OK. But when they found out the class was small they asked if I would mind adding the 8-10 year old. Um yes! This was a physics class. There is a difference in math ability and since there were two 14 year old (mine was turning 14 in a month) I told them it was a pretty bad idea. They keep the classes seperated.

    I have another child (the one heading to college) who was extremely advanced in math and in his public school they didn't allow a move up. So I made a big fuss, and they tested him... And put him in a higher math class. Not parent ego in his case. It was student need proven by test scores.

    But as a former PS parent, I have seen the worst in parents who believe little Johnny is terribly gifted. But not every single Johnny is at a higher level, yet so so so many parent want their johnnies to be with the smartest (older) kids. There was so much ego, especially in the elementary school and there were actually fights in PTA meetings when kids were moved out of advanced classes because a child who was more advanced actually needed place. One dad had a tantrum because his kid was being displaced by a kid who was tested at a higher level. His kid was going to be put into a classes with the "regular" kids and this was unacceptable.

    Glad that stage is over.

  8. #17
    Senior Member Enlightened Artmama's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2015


    I would be an option C person - I go by ability and ask if my child can be moved into a higher/lower level. In a lot of cases the age isn't a big deal - it is about the maturity but sometimes there are insurance considerations for the program providers and such. As an arts educator I am always more concerned about maturity than age anyway. I'll take an artistically inclined 5yo over an 8yo that still runs with scissors and shoves crayons up his nose any day!

  9. #18


    Quote Originally Posted by darkelf View Post
    I have 5 boys.... They all road bikes "late" at around 8. (I even got the younger 2 balance bikes and while that helped some, their motor skills didn't kick into gear until about 8) shoe tying? seriously I gave up. It takes my 17 year old son 10 minutes to put on his shoes or change his shoes. (And he is in Track, where you change your shoes for different events)I won't even talk about potty training. They understood the concept fine, but the motor skills to potty train took forever to kick in.

    Thanks for mentioning this. DS has had trouble riding a bike at 8. We have hesitated getting him another one (he outgrew his old one) and are trying to figure out if we should wait.

  10. #19


    Only once did I ask for him to participate in an activity that was a year above him. It doesn't work for him.

    His ability level is usually fine, but his emotional-maturity level is an issue. As a result, I have decided not to ask to put him in above his age. I would rather that he is older age-wise then younger in the group.

    Though this always causes problems too, because he is so tall that people expect even more from him. (He's is as tall as some 12 year olds.)

  11. #20


    Quote Originally Posted by Mariam View Post
    Thanks for mentioning this. DS has had trouble riding a bike at 8. We have hesitated getting him another one (he outgrew his old one) and are trying to figure out if we should wait.
    My daughter started riding without training wheels later than most kids. She was nervous so she went too slow and would fall. She was also on medication that made her spacey and confused; I think it may have affected her balance too. I was also part of her delay because a part of me was glad she wasn't riding since she has epilepsy and I worried. Now, she loves riding her bike!

    Regarding purchasing bikes, we have gone through several for each because the kids keep growing more than we anticipate. But we didn't want them on bikes that were too big for them.
    homeschooled 4th through 8th grade - currently in public high school 10th grade
    Dumplett (girl - age 15) and Wombat (boy - age 15)

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