Results 1 to 5 of 5
  1. #1

    Default Working on having various interests, being patient, less easily bored

    My dd is 6, if she has any differences, they are so mild, that everybody else thinks that I am crazy, but this is a different conversation. Whatever traits she has, I hope to get answers that will help other parents with any kids.

    She gets bored easily and she is is specific interests since she was 3 years old (birds, dinosaurs, some cooking) and is reluctant to do anything that she is not interested in.

    In our homeschool have planned both project times and more organized times. During project times when she gets to learn what she wants (birds, dinosaurs), she leads, I help her with her ideas. More structured times this year are story times, Montessori trays, art, reading, math, gym, music.

    She is very reluctant, bored, tries not to follow instructions, to do her own thing, asks to leave. I make classes maximum 30 minutes long per subject, but even that is long for her. She knows very strongly what she is and not interested about: she tells me she does not like fairies or pretty things, she only wants to learn dinosaurs. She is ready to play with her per duck all day long, and she talks to other kids a lot about her own interests, and does not share theirs so much.



    First question is how can I help her be less easily bored, more patient and have an open mind. I cannot incorporate EVERYTHING into dinosaurs. I think other things are also important to learn about. I think I need to work on her to develop open mind and patience, but how?

    Second question do I have a cause for concern about her development?

  2. Thank You Leaderboard
  3. #2

    Default

    Welcome to the forum.

    I hear you are feeling frustrated that your daughter will not willingly participate in the learning that you have organized. She sounds like she has lots of keen and wonderful interests. I know you have said you cannot incorporate everything into her interests, but have you tried to see how it goes? I think that would be a worthwhile experiment, particularly considering she is still little and the type of math/reading etc. she needs to do can be themed for an interest. You could do easily do dinosaur or bird music, math, gym/movement/dance, reading, and story times. I am not sure what Montessori trays are as I have no experience with them, but can you make them dinosaur or bird themed?

    For lengths of sessions, I homeschooled my youngest till she was about 5.5 and decided she wanted to try school, but I found we usually did taught things in sessions much shorter than 30 min. Like 10 to 15 min. Then she would have a break either playing, doing something more self-directed, or a fun thing (playing with kitchen science or art).

    Your daughter sounds lovely. From what you have written I don't see anything you would be concerned about. Are there other learning or behavior issues you are having?

    My oldest has tested as gifted with a low processing speed and my youngest is probably gifted but I have not had her tested yet. I think it is quite common for kids like this to have really intense interests and be very focused on them and not be that into reciprocal conversation with other kids. I know my oldest, even at 10.5, she just has these things that she is so intense about and she just wants to talk them out and she completely does not have the brain space to remember to participate in reciprocal conversation with her friends. It is something I gently remind her of and she is slowly getting there over time. The aim for me is to have it sorted by the time she is needing to make her own way in the world as an adult. I never had gifted testing as a child, but from knowing myself and my kids now, I think I am. And I know participating in reciprocal conversation is something I have to really actively work on and remind myself to do. It is not something that comes naturally. I know I can be really intense in conversation (both spoken and written!) and just overload from my end and forget to ask questions and listen to others.
    New Zealand-based. DD 10 (year 6 [NZ system]) homeschooled, and DD 5 (year 1 [NZ system]) who is currently trying out public school.

    Freelance copyeditor, specializing in scientific text, who will make mistakes in my posts (I don't self-edit).

  4. #3

    Default

    Welcome!
    How is your daughter with her reading, writing, and arithmatic? If she is making steady progress on those, anything else is just bonus. Dinosaurs may be mindlessly dull by this point to you, but if shes still focused on learning about them, its not a bad interest. I tried getting my older boy interested in “ancient history” and for the love of Osiris and Zeus, it just wasnt going to happen at that age.
    You can model new interests for her (plant a garden in the yard, knit in front of her, etc), watch interesting shows on tv to entice her, put together tinker crates and get her interested because theyre cool. Museum camps, nature park story-times, junior ranger programs all are geared to generate interest from the littler ones.
    Ive found trying to foist a new interest on my kids doesnt seem to work, and needs a more subtle strategy. (Oldest still doesnt really care about the Greek Pantheon.)
    Dinosaurs are a great way to use reference encyclopedias, to learn the earths natural history, to learn the continents, as well as the prehistoric continents. Sorry youre sick of them! I went through that too!
    Homeschooling DS13, DS6.

    Atheist.

    My spelling was fine, then my brain left me.

  5. #4

    Default

    She definitely sounds like a pretty average 6yo to me in terms of attention span. You could even cut that 30 minutes per subject down to 20 minutes and save yourself the extra 10 minutes of frustration, 20 minute lessons are plenty for a 6 year old.

    On how to help her be less bored, is she not able to entertain herself, as in she wants you to find her something to do all the time or are you talking about she finds anything that is not about birds or dinosaurs boring? For the former, you just need to make her entertain herself in small increments until she can do it at an age appropriate level. If it is the latter, is there any reason she can't follow her interests other than you think she needs to widen her horizons? What is it that you want her to at least be mildly interested in that she is resisting? Other than reading, writing and arithmetic instruction, which you could add a fun dino twist to if you wanted now and then to help her interest, there isn't a whole lot else that is essential for a 6 year old to learn that can't be learned later. If this is a passion of hers that could turn into a lifelong thing, I don't see a reason to force her into a whole lot else right now. She has many many more years to explore the big wide world but only 1 year to be a dino fascinated 6 year old, KWIM?

    My current six year old loves all things animals, especially horses and dogs. With my oldest son (20), it was all things military and he did end up joining the military after high school. My second oldest son (18), it was Thomas the tank engine and trains in general. With my oldest daughter(17), it was babies and baby dolls at 6yo (she loved being in charge of her baby sister at the time too lol). I can't remember offhand what my other two kids loved at 6yo, with my younger daughter I think it was mostly just reading everything she could get her hands on. With my second youngest son, nothing really sticks out as being a head over heels interest for him at 6yo. But anyways, my point is all six of my kids have had times in their childhood where they were completely obsessed with something and found anything else to be boring or only tolerated it because they were bribed or threatened with removal of privileges if they didn't at least feign interest lol ( I am mostly joking on that last one :-P ).

    For some of them, it was a lifelong thing, like my oldest and his interest in the military. For the others, it didn't hurt them one bit to indulge in their interests while they were little, they eventually developed other interests and wanted to learn about other things and so far no one has been appalled that I didn't teach them this or that at a particular age.

    Now all this aside, if she really does border on the extreme with her interest, as in she can go on and on with obscure facts about every dinosaur she has ever read about, sounds like a walking encyclopedia when she gets to talking about her passion, doesn't seem to understand when she goes on these long winded, single sided conversations that the person she is "conversing" with has long since lost interest, has trouble understanding the social cues of her peers, has tantrums and meltdowns over small changes in her environment or routine, has sensory issues (clothes have to feel just right, food must be a certain texture or avoids certain textures, can't tolerate noises like vacuums or flushing toilets, etc.) you might mention these things to her pediatrician or family doctor and ask if you can be referred to a specialist to look into these things. But if she's just dino obsessed and nothing else, then she's probably just a normal 6yo exploring a passion.

  6. #5

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by MapleHillAcademy View Post

    Now all this aside, if she really does border on the extreme with her interest, as in she can go on and on with obscure facts about every dinosaur she has ever read about, sounds like a walking encyclopedia when she gets to talking about her passion, doesn't seem to understand when she goes on these long winded, single sided conversations that the person she is "conversing" with has long since lost interest, has trouble understanding the social cues of her peers, has tantrums and meltdowns over small changes in her environment or routine, has sensory issues (clothes have to feel just right, food must be a certain texture or avoids certain textures, can't tolerate noises like vacuums or flushing toilets, etc.) you might mention these things to her pediatrician or family doctor and ask if you can be referred to a specialist to look into these things.
    Just wanted to add, this is what my DD10 is like, which is why at 7 we finally took her to an educational psychologist for a cognitive assessment, and this is when she was diagnosed as gifted with lower processing speed. There can be other diagnoses that lead to similar symptoms as well.

    I for one think that assessments and such like are hugely valuable in knowing your child and them knowing themselves. So if it is something that you just have a gut feeling about then keep a list of the little things that you find "off" and, if you can afford it, seek a professional opinion. It is hard for outsiders to really know, and even as parents, we often we feel their behaviors are "off" but don't have enough experience with other children to fully realize that they are.
    New Zealand-based. DD 10 (year 6 [NZ system]) homeschooled, and DD 5 (year 1 [NZ system]) who is currently trying out public school.

    Freelance copyeditor, specializing in scientific text, who will make mistakes in my posts (I don't self-edit).

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
About us

SecularHomeschool.com was created to provide information, resources, and a place to share and connect with secular homeschoolers across the world. Secularhomeschool.com aims to be your one-stop shop for all things homeschool! We will be highlighting information about wonderful secular homeschool resources, and keeping you up to date with what is going on in the world of secular homeschooling. But that is only the beginning. SHS is your playground. A place to share the things that are important to you. A place to create and join groups that share your interests. A place to give and get advice. There are no limits to what you can do at Secular Homeschool, so join today and help build the community you have always wanted.

SecularHomeschool.com is a community and information source where secular homeschoolers ARE the majority. It is the home for non-religious homeschoolers, eclectic homeschoolers, freethinking homeschoolers AND anyone interested in homeschooling irrespective of religion. This site is an INCLUSIVE community that recognizes that homeschoolers choose secular homeschool materials and resources for a variety of reasons and to accomplish a variety of personal and educational goals. Although SecularHomeschool.com, and its members, have worked hard to compile a comprehensive directory of secular curricula, it does not attest that all materials advertised on our site, in our newsletters, or on our social media profiles are 100% secular. Rather, SecularHomeschool.com respects the aptitude of each individual homeschool parent to fully research any curriculum before acquiring it, to ensure that it holistically meets the educational, personal, and philosophical goals of each homeschooler.

Join us
Working on having various interests, being patient, less easily bored