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View Full Version : Frustrated with our HS enrichment program.



coloradoalice
10-09-2011, 03:19 PM
My kids go to a one day a week program through one of the school districts in the area. It's for HS kids only. I changed us to a different location this year mostly because it's more convenient with the commute since it's just a couple minutes from my husbands office but also because I was hoping for a location where we would fit in better. Meaning there would be less religious people. At the one we attended the last two years I'm pretty sure we were the only non-christians and it got to be really annoying, I mean if I wanted them in a christian school I'd put them in one. This program is PS run so I thought it wouldn't be an issue.

Anyway, so we move to this new location which is much larger and more diverse. I was hopeful. But since we started my daughter has informed me that everyone in her class is christian, my sons teacher has invited us to her church and I have been pinned down in no less than 3 conversations where I had to listen to another parent go on and on about church. :punch:

Thing is, I don't care, be religious, whatever. But why do these people have to throw it out as basically the first thing ever discussed? And the assumption we are christian has me really pissed. On friday this one mom was just going on and on about her church and how often they attend and all that and I'm just uh huhing her without asking questions or even looking very interested and she just. won't. stop.

This on top of the fact that I've already had to have talks with 2 of the teachers about their incentive/punishment systems which my kids just don't get because that's not how we do things, and after volunteering Friday and feeling the whole PS atmosphere, well, I'm just not happy about it.

The kids love it though. Love the teachers, love the kids, love the classes, love the teachers, just love it. They like their one day away and honestly I do too, it's like a breath of fresh air to not be hounded all day long. But I also stress that whole day that they are getting along fine, not getting into trouble or not understanding something that no one is explaining to them.

I don't even know that there is a solution really. If I pulled them out right now they would be devastated. So trying to make the best of it and enjoy it for the good, the chance for them to meet other home schooled kids, learn from other adults, do things that are easier done in groups.

So yeah, just venting I guess.

raegan
10-09-2011, 03:44 PM
ugh. When I'm trapped in similar conversations, I make a quick point to say "I'm atheist" or "We're not Christian" rather dismissively and they tend to stfu. Other than that, I've got nothin' helpful. Just sorry even a PS program is wrought with religion. :(

dbmamaz
10-09-2011, 04:39 PM
Do you have to stay there? Can you just go have a cup of coffee somewhere? Honestly, this reminds me of what it was like to, you know, send the kids to school. I think its kinda like letting them eat junk food. If they are having a good time and it gives you a break, dont sweat it. One day a week it isnt going to ruin them. You are making sure they get a good education, this is more like a socail club for them!

coloradoalice
10-09-2011, 08:04 PM
I definitely don't have to stay there, I was just there this Friday because you have to help out a few hours. I'm just pinned down by other parents because my daughter is a social butterfly and wants me to meet everyones mom and exchange phone numbers and all that.

I know you are right, it won't ruin them and we all enjoy the break. I was just hopeful it would be better at this new location, that it wouldn't be uncomfortably religious.

Batgirl
10-09-2011, 08:09 PM
Just smile and nod, even if it's through gritted teeth......and feel free to vent here every evening if you want to! :D Hopefully, they're nice people in other ways....that always makes the religion part slightly easier to take, for me.

I just reread your background on another thread and want to urge you to just not be there if it's going to cause too much stress.

Accidental Homeschooler
10-09-2011, 08:20 PM
I wonder if it won't get better. Maybe they are just trying to reassure you that they good Christians, you know because you are new and they want to make a good impression.

dbmamaz
10-09-2011, 09:32 PM
No, people who live in xtian-dominated societies really think thats the 'normal' thing to talk about - church. Church is the center of their lives, where they find all their freinds and get all their support, where their kids make their closest freinds, where they go when they want to do good for others, where they go for socail events . . often they go to church at least 3 times a week. Thats just what they talk about. So its hard to get a good feel for how nice they might be outside of the church stuff because, really, thats pretty much what they do.

I was suprised to hear that CO had such a xtian-dominated home school scene. My cousin had gone to school there and lived there for a while, and she was such a radical liberal, I had kinda assumed all of CO was like that . . . policitally correct outdoors-ey environmentalists or something. I guess I was wrong.

Batgirl
10-09-2011, 10:47 PM
I understand that it can be very polarized....like the cities and suburbs are liberal, but outside of that, I've heard it's extremely conservative.

mommykicksbutt
10-10-2011, 02:08 PM
I agree with Cara, xtians think that church is all there is and all that they are is wrapped up in church; they have been brain-washed into thinking that they do not have an identity of their own if separated from their church. I also find that many xtians try to out christian each other, the "I'm more christian than you" mentality. They brag about how much they go or how much they do there or how much they tithe trying to make the other christians jealous or envious that they are better christians they everyone around them. This may be the case at your new location.

As soon Mrs. Virgin Mary Braggart opens her fat religious trap about her damn fairy-tale (I am nothing without my church) church I would say "excuse me" and walk away. Do that enough times and she will get the hint that talking about church will cause her to be talking to herself (or themselves). If you are confronted just tell them that you find the subject very deeply personal then quote Matthew 6:5 "And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly." This should give them a tinge of guilt. (although guilt works better with catholics than evangelicals)

Hampchick
10-10-2011, 02:29 PM
Very frustrating. I can't even imagine having everyone around me pulling out their Christian credentials like that. I don't know what I'd do, but I'm pretty anti-social anyway so I'd probably find a way to walk away or end up saying something snarky. I'd be really upset by the teacher inviting me to her church though. Didn't you say this was run by the local school district? She may not have crossed a line, but that would make me feel very uncomfortable. Since the kids are loving it I'd keep them going, but boy I think I'd be keeping a closer eye on things just for my own peace of mind.

Lak001
10-10-2011, 04:02 PM
Public schools can be very christian, though in a passive way. I felt the same in dd's public school. Parents would talk a lot about weekly Bible study group and such, though they would never involve me in any conversations probably because of how I look. I would just eaves-drop on them.
I think the positive side to sending them away for a few hours is the time you get to spend alone, and for yourself. I think it's worth the trade off. Actually I miss that after we started homeschooling :(

Lak001
10-10-2011, 04:05 PM
I
If you are confronted just tell them that you find the subject very deeply personal then quote Matthew 6:5 "And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly." This should give them a tinge of guilt. (although guilt works better with catholics than evangelicals)

That was cool :D

coloradoalice
10-10-2011, 08:46 PM
I was suprised to hear that CO had such a xtian-dominated home school scene. My cousin had gone to school there and lived there for a while, and she was such a radical liberal, I had kinda assumed all of CO was like that . . . policitally correct outdoors-ey environmentalists or something. I guess I was wrong.

I bet your cousin was in or near Boulder. That's a mecca for the liberal, I lived there when I first moved to CO and I would love to live there again. Denver is pretty liberal too, and there are pockets here and there but a lot of the state is very rural and very conservative. If DH could get a job that justified it we would move to Boulder where I would probably then be cast out as not nearly liberal or crunchy or jaded enough, lol!! :)