View Full Version : On the subject of ADHD..patience...

09-24-2011, 12:30 AM
As I mentioned on some other threads, I "know" ds has ADHD, even though we don't have a "diagnosis". I feel terrible, because if this is so, I realize ds has trouble focusing, and calming down. But I find most days I am at my wit's end with him :( I have to continuously ask him to come back to work, redirect him, repeat instructions...and this to a gifted 12th yo...

I do not know how to continue to handle him, because I know no one will be more patient with him than I..and even I lose it SIGH

Also, I worry about future implications for him??

I need to be better with him, and more patient, but I feel like I'm failing :(

09-24-2011, 01:18 AM
Ok, some of this will sound silly, some will sound strange, and some will sound counter-intuitive. These are all things that have actually been known to help kids with ADHD, including 2E kids.

Fill a balloon with sand or table salt. Don't blow it up, just do the normal stretch you do before using a balloon, put in a funnel, fill to about handful-sized, and tie it off. Use normal sized balloons, not overly large ones and especially not water balloons. Allow him to play with - squeezing it, poking, gently tossing it, etc. while he works.

Set a small bowl of marbles or those little glass stones on the table/desk near him while works. Again, allow him to play with them while he works.

Let him have small, non-messy snacks while he works. Things like grapes, carrot sticks/baby carrots, or nuts are great for this.

Let him chew gum while he works.

Sitting on an exercise ball in stead of a chair can help.

Obviously, let him take breaks & require at least half the breaks to involve physical activity, but not enough to make him too tired to work.

A small amount of coffee or other caffeinated beverage may help his attention.

Protein is really important in the mornings, and can help with attention.

Make sure he's sleeping well. Often Gifted people need less sleep than others, but if he's not getting the amount his body needs it will cause problems. If he's not sleeping well, start with trying to set bedtime routines, including allowing him to read in bed before shutting off the lights.

Get him a day planner and help him use it. He needs to learn those organizational habits & they will help with the other stuff. For Dea, we found a planner fore college students works best. Also get a pack of multi-colored pens and help him color coordinate his planner and his calendar (he should have his own calendar, too). You can do different colors for each school subject and coordinate his folders, binders, book covers, whatever school materials you use. You can also use different colors for each activity he's in outside of school, family stuff, appointments, etc. Sit down with him every weekend, go over how well he kept to schedule the previous week, discuss ways the next week could be even better, and help plan the next week.

Figure out his ideal study conditions. So many things that talk about learning proper study skills make it sound as though there is only one way to study. That is simply not true. If he needs silence, consider letting him wear headphones (not hooked up to anything) to block out sound. If he needs background noise, consider letting him listen to music. Try different types of music. He might work better with classical or with jazz or the normal music he listens to. Try different seating - soft comfy chair, couch, sitting at desk/table, on the bed, on the floor. Let him try out some different ways and see what works best for him.

Read him the directions and ask him to tell them back to you. Then move to him reading the directions to himself, and telling them back to you. Eventually, you want to get to self-talk, where he reads the directions and talks himself through them.

Start with short lessons and work toward longer ones. I know that at 12 we want to have them sit & do a decent amount of work, but if they haven't yet learned the skills to focus themselves, that won't work.

Also, I firmly believe that kids need to understand any conditions that they have. So, I really recommend the two of you doing some research together, so you both have a better understanding of it.

09-24-2011, 07:06 AM
Thanks for all of these Brandi. they sound great. I know come Monday, I will be trying most of them ....

09-24-2011, 09:53 AM
Those are wonderful suggestions! My child doesn't have ADHD, well I don't think, but I will be using most of your suggestions to help get him on track! Love it!

09-25-2011, 08:39 AM
My son has ADHD and was diagonized when he was 5 he is now 13. Most of the things Busy suggested we use with him and his adhd sister. One thing I also found that helps is we allow them to use there mp3 players/ipods whiles they work. I also dont make them sit at the table if they dont want to. They can sit on the floor or on the couch or even move around as long as they get their work done and dont bother anyone else. good luck and if you ever need to talk hit me up I know what you are going through :)

09-25-2011, 09:40 PM
I also have nothing to add to Brandi's list. That's pretty comprehensive! :)