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MarkInMD
02-24-2011, 12:52 AM
I'm curious to know how the rest of you handle your child(ren)'s sleep schedules, as in do you have an assigned bedtime and wake-up time for them? Or do you let them decide that for themselves?

I ask because we used to have Hurricane on the schedule of get to bed by 9:30 at the latest and up by 7:30 when his brother gets up to get ready to go to public school, so that we can start homeschooling by 9:00. However, we found that he was dragging by 11:00 and often needed a nap. So we started thinking that maybe he's a natural night owl (like I am). Since our schedule is still somewhat flexible, we decided to let him get tired on his own in his room from 9:30 on -- on his computer, his e-reader, doing artwork, whatever. Quite often his light isn't off until 11 pm or after. He wakes up on his own anywhere from 9:30-10:30 am, at which point we get ready for the day. Since we've instituted this, we have had zero problems with him being tired and wanting a nap in midday. So I think we're going to let it continue because even though we start later, ultimately we get more accomplished in a shorter amount of time than before.

Does anybody else do this sort of thing?

Batgirl
02-24-2011, 01:03 AM
Arggh, no mainly because I'm desperate for some time to myself and/or with dh at the end of the day, and if I allowed that, I'd never get it. I am emphatically not a night owl, though. If I go to bed later than 10:30, I am tired the next day no matter how late I sleep in. Both boys go to bed between 8:00-30 and wake up at around 7:30. Sometimes I let them sleep past this, but I try to regulate it because it seems to make mornings and evenings easier. Batman has sleep issues though, like a lot of asd kids. He gets so anxious he will not allow himself to fall asleep and actually falls asleep at around 9:30-10:00. (Robin has no problems.) I've been meaning to see if melatonin might help this a bit. The boys share a room, which complicates things, too, because if Robin thinks Batman is getting privileges, he stays awake. Maybe we should try a reading light and a book after Robin falls asleep.....it might get him reading on his own a bit more.....ah well, food for thought.

mzfinks
02-24-2011, 01:11 AM
I am pretty strict on bedtimes, but here's why: My boys wake up between 6:30-7:00 am no matter WHAT time they go to bed. If I let them stay up late, they are tired and fussy the next day-and YES they still wake up between 6:30-7:00 even on Sat/Sun.

So, we put the kids to bed between 8:00 and 8:30 EVERY night except when dh and I have a date night and then it's no later than 10:00. We do not allow any screen time before bed and we read a few good books right before bedtime (most of the time, sometimes it's just too hectic an evening). I find that screentime (TV, computer, e-reader etc gets my 5 yr old too mentally wound up and he cannot sleep.

Stella M
02-24-2011, 01:18 AM
Oh dear. I got kicked off a radical unschooling forum ( otherwise known as, 'we feel this forum may not be meeting your needs') over bed times, so I'm always a bit scared to go there.

Ds goes to bed around 7.30 for a read-aloud, snack, we listen to a radio show together and/or chat, lights out at 8.30. I stay in there till he goes to sleep ( yeah, I know, he's 7...but we have gotten him out of our bed finally! )

Girls stay up till 9/9.30, read a little in their rooms, lights out by 10 at the latest.

I suppose you might call the girl's bedtime a negotiated bedtime. Ds's is imposed. They all need a lot of sleep and I'm not ok with starting my day in the afternoon. I'm just not.

TamaraNC
02-24-2011, 01:59 AM
We have a set bedtime for the littles, 8:08pm (which they picked because it was Sportacus's bedtime on the TV show Lazytown (http://www.lazytown.com/Default.aspx)), and they can wake up whenever they wake up. Our oldest needs to be in his room by 9:30pm and has to get up for PS by 6:30am.

ItBeganInCamp4
02-24-2011, 02:01 AM
I'm the night owl and everyone else in the family are morning people. Like mzfinks said, my girls will be up sometime between 6 and 7 no matter what time they go to bed (we've tried!!). The 3 year old gets in bed at 7/7:30 (depending on how fussy she is) the 6 year old gets in bed at 8. They're usually both asleep by 8:30. They wake up whenever they wake up, but the rule is they don't play or come get us until 7am (unless there's a problem). Luckily for me, my husband is fine getting up and feeding them and getting everyone dressed and I sleep in with the baby until he leaves for work a little after 8. The big girls have free time while I nurse and eat breakfast and we start school around 10.

MarkInMD
02-24-2011, 06:18 AM
Arggh, no mainly because I'm desperate for some time to myself and/or with dh at the end of the day, and if I allowed that, I'd never get it.

Yeah, that was an issue at first, because he'd keep coming out and telling us stuff he'd just read, or wanting to play video games, or something, so we instituted the policy of him having to be in his room that whole time unless he needed a drink or had to use the bathroom.

I can definitely understand wanting to be strict about bedtime with chronic early risers. Who needs the headache? :)

hockeymom
02-24-2011, 06:28 AM
DS has always had his own sleep schedule, literally since birth. It was fascinating to watch his napping needs evolve when he was little and I was very fortunate to be staying at home so his (rigid) needs were always met. As of last year he would still go to bed around 6:30 or 7pm (yeah, I know!) and wake up exactly 12 hours later. This year--finally--he's starting to stay up just a little bit later but is always in bed by 7:30 or 8 (unless he has a late hockey game) and is up by 7:00 or 7:30am. As self-scheduled as he is, he has no problems when we travel and adjusts easily to time zones.

Melissa: We stay with DS until he falls asleep too--I love it and dread the day I"ll have to give it up! :)

dottieanna29
02-24-2011, 09:21 AM
My oldest sets her own bedtime. She can stay up as late as she wants as long as she gets up for school in the morning.

DH takes the little guys into their room around 9pm and lays down with them (they want daddy for this, not mommy). They usually fall asleep by 9:30/10:00, then DH and I go to bed. Both of them wind up in our bed at some point in the night, then DD gets up around 7:30/8:00 no matter what, DS doesn't get up until 9/9:30. It works except I'm always exhausted since it seems to take forever for me to fall asleep.

I always sleep better in the morning hours.

ercswf
02-24-2011, 09:26 AM
My older son I am a little more relaxed about bedtimes(read he just does what we make his brother do because he feels its fair that way). My 6 year old requires a set sleep schedule or else he will derail. By derail I mean go from appearing to be a totally normal child to all his adjustment issues magnified a zillion times. We also have a standing script for sleeping pills though refuse to use them because thins can get really bad if we don't keep with bed times. I have my younger son go to bed at 8pm then he gets himself up at 7am every day. He only naps before karate. My older son will lay down and read from 8-9ish pm and is back up at 6am no mater what time he went to bed.

Riceball_Mommy
02-24-2011, 09:53 AM
I try to get my daughter to clean up her things and start settling down by 8-8:30, however she'll be asleep anywhere between 8:30 and 10:00 usually. She'll get up anywhere between 5am and 8am, though she just gets up and plays in the room quietly until I get up. Sometimes she'll get up earlier and then go back to sleep for a little while, a few times I've caught her up at 3am, but then I wake up and she's asleep at 7.

bcnlvr
02-24-2011, 09:53 AM
DS9- bedtime 8pm
DS6- bedtime 730pm

They both roll out at about 7-730am. They also have separate sleeping areas now and that has solved any bedtime issues that we've had.

lynne
02-24-2011, 10:34 AM
I usually read to them at 9 and then they both go to bed but I let them read in bed until 10. My older DS falls asleep pretty much as soon as his head hits the pillow and he is usually up early, around 7AM. It is rare that I have ever had to wake him, even when he was going to school.

DS(6) is a night owl. I usually turn his light out at 10 and can still hear him talking to himself for a while, sometimes close to 11. Sometimes it is tough to wake him for school at 7:45 but once he is up he is fine, not crabby like my older one gets w/o sleep.

PaganHSMama
02-24-2011, 11:14 AM
No schedule here, but we are usually upstairs by 11pm. I am a morning person, so I can sleep a full 7-8 hours and still be up early in the morning to work on my own before my daughter is up (which is usually 10:30-11am).

Tosha Crow-Walker
02-24-2011, 11:37 AM
Interesting thread! My son has to get up between 5:30 and 6 since I work and he's currently in daycare.. but he is a night owl by heart. He'll stay up as late as I let him for the most part. Sometimes he'll pass out before 10. Normally I lay in bed with him between 8 and 9 during the week (I'm not good with schedules) and sometimes as late as 9:30 on the weekends. Even with that, he's like the other kids where he pretty much always wakes up at 7 regardless of when he went to bed. He still naps though (only 2.5, I'm just being nosy).

If I didn't work I would probably just let him sleep and rise when he felt like it... because it would give me the liberty to do so myself and it is hard for me to be really scheduled! I am getting a little better at it though.

Aandwsmom
02-24-2011, 11:59 AM
My boys (14 and almost 13) are in bed at 8:30 Sun-Thurs and 9 Fri and Sat. I know that is early but they are also early risers naturally and get crabby when they are up past 9:30 or so. Most of the time, because they are dawdlers in getting ready for bed it ends up being 9pm tuck-in every day.
And because they are early risers(they would be up at 5-6am daily if I let them)....... they are not allowed to come out until 6:45am M-F. If they wake up early, then they can read or play their DS. Weekends it is 7:30. They may watch the TV in their room after 7am IF they are both awake.
I grew up with a strict schedule for bedtimes and I have always made sure the boys had one, they do better when on a schedule and I try to make sure they get the amount of sleep their growing bodies need.

MarkInMD
02-24-2011, 12:26 PM
I think it's good that we all seem to be aware of our kids' natural circadian rhythms and go with what works for them. I think that's something else that PS misses out on -- that not every kid works well in the morning, or if they do, they can't sustain it through the day if they don't have rest. Yet you can't "make" them go to bed early, because they're not tired then!

my2monkeys
02-24-2011, 05:37 PM
Sleep has always been super important in our house. I need that down time at night for sure. Both boys are tucked in bed between 7:30 and 8pm. Monkey 1 wakes up anytime between 5 and 6am and his brother can generally sleep until 7am. I am not an early riser by choice but have to be up at 5-5:30am on work days so Monkey 1 can be up with me then. On my days off he knows he has to stay in his room until 7am. That's the whole reason we learned to tell time so early LOL.

Hampchick
02-24-2011, 06:19 PM
I am pretty strict on bedtimes, but here's why: My boys wake up between 6:30-7:00 am no matter WHAT time they go to bed. If I let them stay up late, they are tired and fussy the next day-and YES they still wake up between 6:30-7:00 even on Sat/Sun.

This is my kids exactly. Man, for the longest time when they were little they'd be up at 5 - 5:30 no matter what. I'm a morning person but that was crazy. Fortunately they tend to sleep a bit later now, but are still always up by 7 which is the time they are allowed to leave their rooms.

Both boys are in their rooms and quiet by 8pm. I've told them they are welcome to stay up as late as they want as long as I can't hear them. Started doing that when DS7 was 4 because he wouldn't stay in his room at night. He was thrilled and stayed up until at least 11pm the first couple of nights until he normalized. He reads or plays quietly with legos and is asleep between 9pm & 10pm most nights. DS5 falls asleep almost immediately most nights.

Miguels mommy
02-24-2011, 06:20 PM
We have a 9:30 pm bed time. That's instilled only when something else isn't going on. He's a kid that just won't pass out until he's been up around 26 hours. He's aloud to stay up in his room a lot of nights and is expected to at least lay in bed quietly for 8 hrs. a night. He has days that he sleeps for 14 hours. His bedtime is for more me to have some quiet time and him to rest.

Jennifer R. James
02-25-2011, 01:54 AM
We're all night-owls. When we try not to be, we're just foggy and dragging all day. It wasn't until my late twenties that I embraced that part of myself and stopped trying to be something I wasn't. Of course, we had to have a schedule while they were in ps, but that was one of the things that made it so miserable for us. Now that they're both teens and we're not in ps, we kind of let them make their own schedules, as long as everyone gets their work done. They get tired and go to their rooms on their own in the evenings. Sometimes I miss them being little, but not that much. :P

Inari
02-25-2011, 05:57 AM
My youngest goes to bed at 8pm on a weekday. My older is allowed to read after 8pm, but only read if she wants to stay up. She usually is asleep by 9pm (4 and 7 years old).

We are up at 7am, and working by 8.30am at the very latest

They go to bed when they are tired Friday night and Saturday night, or not, and are allowed both games and tv as well.

kcanders
02-25-2011, 08:40 AM
Our goal is for our kids to be in bed by 8pm and then they can read until 8:30. My son usually easily falls asleep before 9pm, but my daughter is a master of not falling asleep. Since she was very little I found it fascinating that she didn't stop moving until she was actually asleep. When she would sleep with us she would get up and down and flop all over the place and then all at once she would stop moving and be asleep. She will do anything to stay awake and often doesn't fall asleep until 10 or later.

alexdk
02-25-2011, 08:57 AM
We have a loose bedtime of 8:30-9:00. My son (12) follows that very closely on his own. He's an early riser and would be up by 6 starting his day if I let him. I ask him to stay in his room until 7am. My girls share a room and the little one (6) goes to bed by 8:30 and falls asleep fast, while my oldest goes to bed at the same time but reads until about 9:30. The little one wakes up first around 7, and Adrienne (13) usually is up by 8:30. I let her sleep in, but no later than 9:30 if it's a school day for us.

missourimom
02-25-2011, 04:01 PM
I am pretty strict on bedtimes, but here's why: My boys wake up between 6:30-7:00 am no matter WHAT time they go to bed. If I let them stay up late, they are tired and fussy the next day-and YES they still wake up between 6:30-7:00 even on Sat/Sun.

Right there with you - my 3 year old is in bed by 7:30 & the 7 year old by 8:30. They are early birds & I have seen more sunrises than I ever thought possible...especially since I am NOT a morning person. lol They are up by 6-6:30am no matter what time they go to bed. Believe me, we tried giving up "our" time in the evenings by keeping them up later & just ended up with crabby kids up early. I'd rather have early bedtimes, a quiet evening with my husband and just have to stumble out of bed at dawn. Thank goodness for programmable coffee makers!

MrsLOLcat
02-25-2011, 04:01 PM
HA! I actually blogged about this very issue this week. Since M2 is still in private school, we do have to be up by 6:45 on school mornings. This isn't a problem for her because she needs very little sleep and is mostly a night owl, but she's also usually up before her alarm in the mornings, unless she's hit a growth spurt. M1 is my sleepy one. Sometimes we'll get up, I'll get M2 to school, and we'll come home so that M1 can go back to bed. He'll often sleep till 10:30-11. M2 has a rest/naptime at school but hasn't taken a nap since she was 2 1/2, so she can choose to read or do puzzles or games while her classmates sleep. For a long time, we put both kids to bed between 7 and 7:30, but nobody would fall asleep before 8. M1 likes to read in bed, but if he gets too far into a book he gets obsessed with finishing it and will force himself to stay up, so less is more when it comes to his bedtime reading. M2 doesn't do that. She just sacks out whenever she's tired, which is usually 8:15-8:30. Anyway, I'm trying to move bedtime back to 8-ish. They're both falling asleep much more quickly, so I'm guessing this time works better for them. Sometimes I hate having to regiment bedtime, but even if I have them both at home, I would make sure we were up and doing school by 9, so not much would change.

missourimom
02-25-2011, 04:11 PM
This is my kids exactly. Man, for the longest time when they were little they'd be up at 5 - 5:30 no matter what. I'm a morning person but that was crazy. Fortunately they tend to sleep a bit later now, but are still always up by 7 which is the time they are allowed to leave their rooms.


My daughter used to wake for the day at 5:15am as an infant & it stuck as her normal time. I felt like throwing a party when she started sleeping until 5:45 & likely did a little dance when she was old enough to read a clock & would play quietly in her room until 7am. I really needed that while I was pregnant with #2!

jess
02-25-2011, 04:25 PM
We're generally done with bedtime stories by about 8:30, and everyone goes to bed after that (DD(4) is often asleep by that point. DS(7) listens to music and I'm not sure how long he actually stays awake. I'm in bed around then, but stay awake reading or otherwise vegging until 9-10, depending on how tired I am.).

Breakfast is around 8, and the kids generally get up on their own well before that, but we wake them up around 7:45 or so if necessary.

jess
02-25-2011, 06:53 PM
On a related note, this morning DD came into our room at about 6:15 and shouted "Guys, it's... early!!"

It's a good thing she's cute.

SueEllen Grieves-Curl
02-25-2011, 09:19 PM
We feel that when children are young they are growing the most so they need as much rest as their bodies tell them they need. I have found that when they are growing they get tired earlier and want to sleep later. And when they are not growing they get up early and get tired later. Even if we put them to bed they will stay up even in the dark.

There have been many times I have woke up to find my oldest already at 6am on the computer. And than there are times she will sleep till 8am.

outskirtsofbs
02-25-2011, 09:51 PM
DD is a night-owl and its just easier (and not as exhausting for me) to let her stay up until around 11-11:30 p.m. on a school night and possibly an hour later or so on the weekend. She has never been a good sleeper and is sleep-deprived most of the time.

brendag
02-25-2011, 10:26 PM
My kids were preemies so we were on a feeding/sleeping schedule with them right from the get go. I somehow managed to breastfeed both of them almost a year. If we didn't have them on a feeding/sleeping schedule, I wouldn't have been able to leave the house! :). That's partly where I get my confidence about homeschooling twins. Maybe I'm deluding myself, but I feel like I made it through that first year and nothing can scare me now! Lol!

My kids are 3 1/2. They get up between 7 and 7:30. I'll let my DD sleep 1/2 hour later and then let her slowly wake up if she needs it. They still nap for about 2 hours around 1pm and are in bed by 8. My DD definitely needs more sleep than my son. I can't see her functioning for any school type things before 9. This is another reason we are going to homeschool.

I used to be a morning person like my son is, but honestly I feel like I lost so much sleep in the first 2 years, that it's rare that I wake up feeling rested. I just figure I'll be tired for another 5-7 years or so and will depend on some kind of caffeine or energy drink to get through the day like I do now. :)

Schedules make our lives doable right now. I'm a slave to the schedule, but hoping to ease into a more relaxed routine soon.

KristinK
02-25-2011, 10:59 PM
Our goal is for our kids to be in bed by 8pm and then they can read until 8:30. My son usually easily falls asleep before 9pm, but my daughter is a master of not falling asleep. Since she was very little I found it fascinating that she didn't stop moving until she was actually asleep. When she would sleep with us she would get up and down and flop all over the place and then all at once she would stop moving and be asleep. She will do anything to stay awake and often doesn't fall asleep until 10 or later.

one of mine (the now-5yr old) would pluck her eyelashes to stay awake. omg it made me CRAZY. This is when she was about 2yrs old. She just would NOT let herself relax to sleep! crazy kids.

**

mine are in the "always rise early" camp. Thankfully they have all seemed to follow the same pattern. When our first was an infant we had to instill at 5:30pm bedtime, and that started to ease our sleep issues. Now she's 7 and is in bed by 8pm, generally asleep soonafter, and up between 7 and 8am (she has learnt to sleep in!)
the 3 and 5yr olds go to bed around 6:30pm and are often asleep by 7pm (except that we have 2 evenings now that we have activities *sigh* it's really messing with the 3yr old). They are both up around 6-7am, no matter what time they go to bed.

Jeni
02-26-2011, 01:49 AM
I am a "night owl" (otherwise known as a genetic sleep problem passed down my mom's line). My husband is not. Neither are my kids as far as I can tell right now. They are all bright eyed and bushy tailed early in the morning. So the children get to bed by 8:00. Each child is read to for however long we feel like with lights out, fan on, our book and flashlight in hand. There are times when this is not a hard and fast rule though. If we have something going on, we are not going to stress too much, but we try for the same time each night. I need my alone time with dh and by myself. I am very hostile otherwise. There is no wake up time for them. I am always the last one up unless we have a dreadfully early appointment for some reason. I would do fine with afternoon school.

Jennifer R. James
02-26-2011, 07:06 AM
Oh, Jeni, I am so glad to hear that I am not alone. Fortunately for me, we're all night owls, but we are criticized for it, at times, by outsiders(in-laws). You have my sympathy, being the only one in the household. Luckily, we all manage to accomplish what we must. :)

kcanders
02-26-2011, 08:05 AM
Kristin-


one of mine (the now-5yr old) would pluck her eyelashes to stay awake. omg it made me CRAZY. This is when she was about 2yrs old. She just would NOT let herself relax to sleep! crazy kids.
That is so funny! My daughter is the exact same way.



mine are in the "always rise early" camp. Thankfully they have all seemed to follow the same pattern. When our first was an infant we had to instill at 5:30pm bedtime, and that started to ease our sleep issues. Now she's 7 and is in bed by 8pm, generally asleep soonafter, and up between 7 and 8am (she has learnt to sleep in!)
the 3 and 5yr olds go to bed around 6:30pm and are often asleep by 7pm (except that we have 2 evenings now that we have activities *sigh* it's really messing with the 3yr old). They are both up around 6-7am, no matter what time they go to bed.

My older two were like that when they were little. No matter what time I put them to bed they would get up around 6am. The difference was, if I put them to be around 7pm they were well rested the next day, as long as they got their naps, and if I put them to be later than that, they were terrors the next day. It was just in the last couple years that we started letting them stay up a little longer (8:30)



When our first was an infant we had to instill at 5:30pm bedtime, and that started to ease our sleep issues.

the 3 and 5yr olds go to bed around 6:30pm and are often asleep by 7pm (except that we have 2 evenings now that we have activities *sigh* it's really messing with the 3yr old).

I'm glad I'm not the only one with early bedtimes for babies. I get so much crap from people when they hear our 11 month old goes to bed at 6:30 (except for two nights when we also have activities and it is closer to 7:30) I hear "if you wouldn't put him to be so early he wouldn't wake up at 4am to nurse" or "The reason he won't nap during the day is because he is getting too much sleep at night" I actually think the opposite is true for both of these. I keep toying with a earlier bedtime for him thinking that will help get him past the 4am nursing (I know earlier bedtimes helped keep my others from waking up during the night and helped them nap better), but it is hard with the older kids and their activities and even just dinner and stuff. You can tell he is still tired, he rubs his eyes and is fussy a good portion of the day. Luckily this week he has started napping a little better a couple 1 hour naps a day is a big improvement! :)

Thanks for your post, I'm glad I'm not alone. :)

hockeymom
02-26-2011, 12:37 PM
Krish: You are definitely not alone! My son went to sleep at 6:30 until he was almost 7. He needed it and knew it, so there were never any problems. At 7 he started staying up a little bit later, like until 7 pm, which made it easier in the sense that we didn't have to rush him off to bed as soon as dinner was over. I'm grateful for his schedule and his early bedtime, it means much needed downtime for us in the evenings. :)

Sam
02-27-2011, 05:01 PM
I have really good sleepers. I am an insomniac so wouldn't be able to have kids that get up at 5am lol DD2 goes to her crib at 7:30pm. I say goes to her crib because she doesn't actually sleep. However, she plays happily, talking to herself in the dark, so we keep putting her there at that time. DD1 goes to bed around 8:30pm (this was only moved up from 8pm about 6 mths ago). DD2 is still up and then starts talking to DD1. They both actually fall asleep around 9:30pm. Wake up is sometime between 8-8:30am.

amym
02-27-2011, 11:59 PM
The kids have an 8:30 bedtime here...hubby is usually asleep by 7! lol. Of course he gets up at 1:30/2:00 to start his day so I can't say that I blame him. The kids are still in ps for the rest of the year so the three of us are up at 6:30 to get ready and out the door by 7:30. They are both early risers even on the weekends; rarely will they sleep past 7. Fortunately, if they get up before me they just go downstairs and make themselves breakfast and watch some cartoons.

InstinctiveMom
02-28-2011, 11:03 PM
I am pretty strict on bedtimes, but here's why: My boys wake up between 6:30-7:00 am no matter WHAT time they go to bed. If I let them stay up late, they are tired and fussy the next day-and YES they still wake up between 6:30-7:00 even on Sat/Sun.
So, we put the kids to bed between 8:00 and 8:30 EVERY night <snip>

You know, when I first read this, I mis-read and thought that YOU made them get up that early - I was appalled. Then I re-read and realized that you have children like mine - that is THEIR preference. I am looking forward to the teen years when "morning' is closer to 10AM than daybreak, LOL. I bet you are, too ;)

Our kids go to their room at 8PM most nights - not necessarily 'bedtime', just to their room. We just got back from a 4-day camping trip without Loverly Husband, so right now, the boys are snuggled up on the couch getting some Dad-time, but most nights, they're in their room by 8PM and expected to stay there. My reasoning is this: we follow an attachment parenting style philosophy. We're present and participating in their day most of their waking hours. In order to recharge my batteries, I REQUIRE some time without them. Bedtime gives me that (not to mention some quality time with my LH). When the boys were little and needed more nighttime care (we co-slept until the boys were 3/4ish full time, then partially until they were 6 or so) we were there for them. Now that they're older and are able to spend more time independently, we both encourage it. They go to bed whenever - usually by 11Pm or so. LH and I are both night owls - our normal bedtime is around 2AM.


Oh dear. I got kicked off a radical unschooling forum ( otherwise known as, 'we feel this forum may not be meeting your needs') over bed times, so I'm always a bit scared to go there.

Srsly?! That's crazy - what does bedtime have to do with unschooling? (that's a rhetorical question) I've had discussions on unschooling that just make no sense to me. I just have to remind myself that diversity is a wonderful thing ;)


DS9- bedtime 8pm
DS6- bedtime 730pm
They both roll out at about 7-730am. They also have separate sleeping areas now and that has solved any bedtime issues that we've had.

Good to know. we're about to put our boys in their own rooms; I'm looking forward to the separation and ensuing peace! :)

~h

BackLitLeo
03-03-2011, 11:23 AM
My goal is to have both kids in bed by 8:30pm. Most of the time they are, although DD has been staying up for another hour after that lately. They both wake up around 8am. I am a night owl and an introvert. I need time by myself to recharge at the end of the day, and I can't go to sleep until after they are both asleep.

jennykay
03-03-2011, 12:16 PM
We've just started experimenting with sleep schedules. Mainly, we're now not imposing them. My 3 yo started fighting me on napping, so I've stopped requiring it. Now he secretly takes naps when I'm busy doing something else - on his own terms. Both kids are requesting to go to sleep either before or right around our original "required" time of 8 pm. I'm sure that will change! With all this great stuff also comes a new negative...our 3 yo likes to get up at 5:30 am and tell us all kinds of things, sing, dance, show us the birds outside, you name it. My hubby and I are so tired that we are not doing a great job setting boundaries. It's very sweet on one hand and irritating at the same time. Maybe we'll start going to bed earlier!!

Little Brownelf
03-07-2011, 02:10 AM
Their bedtime is our bedtime. It's pretty much been that way from birth. I work outside the home and dh stays home with them. Where once it was so I could see them more, now it's to be able to help school them some. They sleep in with dh. He has some insomnia problems and doesn't sleep well every night.

Now if they woke earlier or we needed to be up early, we would shift this. But for now, this works.

higgledypiggledy
03-11-2011, 12:39 AM
We are currently renegotiating bedtime in our house. The only thing I miss about our ps days was that we had an enforced 7:15 bedtime and I got the evening to myself. Now chaos reigns. There are experiments that need checking, just one more chapter to read or who knows what going on in our house at all hours of the night. I've got one kidlet really into astronomy, so he follows a date book and HAS to stay up for important events, like a little blip of light I can barely discern appearing on the horizon at precely 1:21am. Sorry, that sounds like I don't aprreciate these discoveries but I admit I am much more tired these days and don't know how to reign things in without quashing their love of discovery. And they won't nap. Sometimes after lunch I just declare, I stayed up with you to read another chapter, with you to look for night crawlers and with you for a star now you get to be very very quiet while I crash. Sometimes it works and sometimes they have to wake me up to show me the very cool thing they just found online and can I please get up so we can do/make it. Rant over. Advice welcome.

CatInTheSun
03-16-2011, 01:19 PM
Oh my goodness, we LOVE Lazytown here and Sports Candy. :)

When Dc#1 was born, we shifted towards her schedule (early riser) -- actually before she was even born since she was most active in utero even at 5-6am. We feel fortunate all 3 kids are pretty much the same. Bedtime (for all 3) is 7pm, up when they wake up (never later than 7a). Because of their schedule, dh picked a shift that means getting up by 4am, so no tolerance for kiddos staying up or shifting schedule. We need some down time!

To OP -- whatever works for the family, works. The only thing I'd be cautious of is the use of electronics after dark (by dc). Kids need to cues of darkness and less stimulation even more than we do. If it were me (and it's not, lol) I'd be fine with staying up in his room, but I'd make sure he only has access for quiet and relaxing things like reading. Our policy is that bedrooms are for sleeping. Period. No tvs, computers, or even (non-sleeping) toys allowed. But as long as what you are doing works, it works! :)

MoonSprite
03-16-2011, 05:02 PM
My DH works nights so bedtimes are...flexible. If they are acting tired, they go to bed earlier. A lot of times they are up until 9:30/10. We all wake up when we wake up, ds usually is the first one awake, but not always. The only time we set an alarm is if we have to be somewhere.:rolleyes:

jeliau
03-19-2011, 07:36 AM
We have a set time but it's 9 p.m. shower and 10 p.m. in bed to actually go to sleep (Fridays 11 p.m.). My son and I are both night-owls and he gets really focused on projects at like 7 or 8 at night. Since I don't need to be up early and neither of us wants to be, he wakes me up whenever he gets up which is usually very regular at 8:30 a.m. We get breakfast and try to start "school" at 10 a.m. Flexible in that too though, sometimes we change it to the afternoon, sometimes skip a day with understanding that it has to be done on a weekend day or to do a 'double day' later in the week. Changing to this much more relaxed schedule actually increased his focus while doing the work I want him to do, and the work/projects he wants to do.

luvmybaby333
03-19-2011, 05:42 PM
Both of my girls go to bed pretty late. We are all kind of backwards anyway (having a tendency to get perky in the evenings, and a desire to hug our pillows a little tighter in the mornings.) Add to that the fact that my husband works 3rd shift, and you have our family naturally gravitating toward a non-traditional sleep schedule. So I usually aim for a 10:00pm bedtime (in my dreams it would be 9:30pm), but realistically they don't usually get into bed until 10:30-11:00pm. My oldest is usually the early riser. She usually wakes up anywhere between 8:00-9:00am. I'm next, depending on how late I was up the night before. (I need a little "Me" time after the girls go to bed.) Then my toddler wakes up around 10:30am. My husband comes home about when my oldest gets up. He has to sleep most of the day, but he wakes up for a few hours in the evening to spend time with us before going to work.

Our schedule definitely isn't for everyone... But it works well for us.

wife&mommy
03-19-2011, 06:13 PM
My kids wake up at 7 no matter what time they go to bed it seems so we do have a pretty set bed time. My 3 year old is asking to go to sleep by 7. At that point my 5 year old is usually ready for some down time so he'll want to go in his room, read stories, etc. until he is ready for sleep which is usually anywhere from 7:30 to 8:30 depending on how tiring our day has been. Works for us. :) I think we are the only ones in our homeschooling group that are up early though. LOL