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View Full Version : How physically affectionate is your family?



CrazyMom
09-06-2015, 06:23 PM
Talking about you and your kids, spouse, other relatives living in your home.....I'm curious to know how affectionate everyone is in their daily life?

Homeschooling Librarian
09-06-2015, 07:41 PM
We're pretty affectionate - lots of snuggles and kisses. Both of my kids calm down faster when they are held, so being affectionate when everything is going well comes in handy when they start melting down.

CrazyMom
09-06-2015, 08:00 PM
We're big huggers and kissers....and snugglers...and hand holders. Not that I have anything against families who are a little more subtle...lol....my hubby's folks were much more reserved, but extremely loving, kind people.

My father in law was sort of an old southern gent...he insisted on doing things like holding my arm if were were walking in an icy parking lot, or warming my car up for me before I headed home from work in the winter, or having a cup of coffee waiting for me in the truck if we were going on an emergency farm call. He wasn't a big hugger or kisser with adults (kids were a different story!)....but he said he loved you...with his actions... in so many adorable ways.

Sometimes Elle would have a fussy day (I took her to work with me and wore her in a backpack, put her in an exersaucer, put her in a playpen, or her swing...the clinic was full of baby crap..lol )......he always knew when to come over to the clinic and offer to take her off my hands for an hour. I'd go to the house to retrieve her....and Elle would be sleeping on his chest in his big chair with him snoring away. He was the world's greatest Grandpa. (My dad was pretty cool too, but he was pretty sick by the time Elle was born, which limited his ability to do things he would have liked to...a lot)

I remember when she got older, and my father in law's arthritis was worse...she learned from her grandma that the doctor said he should go for a walk everyday to keep flexible. She would announce...."I need to go walk my old man, Mom! See you later!" She'd drag him outside and walk him...and he never refused.

All families are different with how they express love. I hug the stuffing out of my kid and hubby and mom on a daily basis. Kiss 'em, too.

Elle's poor boyfriend is a little afraid of me, I think.....cause it's hard to come to my house more than a couple of times without getting hugged and kissed goodbye, force fed, and asked to "phone when you get home, so we know you made it ok". LOLOLOL.

I love that Elle will still sleep with me sometimes when her dad is away overnight. We'll talk in the dark for hours....and it's just lovely.

I know this is a weird thread....but I think at the end of the day....love is the most important thing you can do for your kids. (Regardless of how you express it....big over the top loud Italian style like my family....or quiet and thoughtful and dear like my hubby's)

If your kids know they're loved, and you keep them alive to adult hood....that's 90% of the job.

skrink
09-06-2015, 09:28 PM
Lots of hugs and kisses here, all three of us. My parents and sibs weren't overly affectionate - I guess I'm making up for lost time. :)

muddylilly
09-06-2015, 09:28 PM
Huggy, huggy!!! Smooch, smooch!!!

Now that you mention it, though, I was just thinking the other day that my oldest ds is now 5' 10".......and I still give him hugs and kisses of course, but snuggling on the couch is physically awkward...KWIM? He just HUGE! It makes me sad :( Eh, I still snuggle him anyway.....actually, he is the initiator.

Interesting question....

KittyP
09-06-2015, 09:46 PM
We are all very affectionate and 'touchy' around here. It's not uncommon to randomly walk by someone and give them a fly-by snuggle then return to regularly scheduled programming. We dogpile on furniture so we can all sit together, play with each others' hair, and generally require physical interaction multiple times a day. Today we were walking home from the library and he was just too cute, so we swooped him up and covered him in kisses, with much giggling on his part. The day before he came and crawled in bed with us and we just snuggled before making breakfast. I'll miss that when he's bigger, but I'm sure we'll still find other ways to be close.

atomicgirl
09-06-2015, 10:04 PM
We are pretty affectionate, but that is because my husband is and the kids have grown up with him. I am a work in progress. I grew up in a "high-five" kind of family. Actually, sometimes high-five might have been optimistic. We were close and loving, but not physical. I've had to learn a lot as an adult.

TFZ
09-06-2015, 10:16 PM
They're all still babies! I wanna put my face on their little faces and smuuuuuush!
Though, I do think DH would be a little more comfortable if ds4 didn't smootch him on the lips. Lolol But I love it!

muddylilly
09-06-2015, 10:56 PM
nothing better than watching your little one slobber a kiss on his uncomfortable dad :)

Oksana
09-07-2015, 01:09 AM
Very physically affectionate with the kids - hugs, kisses, holding, snuggling, often sleeping together.

crazyme
09-07-2015, 01:11 AM
We have clingy-clingertons here. I love them to pieces and love all the hugs and snuggles, but geez, sometimes they just have to step away and go do something on their own. That said, I love that my almost teen (two more months!) still needs an enormous amount of hugs every day and holds my hand sometimes.

Homeschooling Librarian
09-07-2015, 01:37 AM
I miss drifting off snuggling M1, and I'd really like to dismantle their bunkbeds so I can.

KittyP
09-07-2015, 04:21 AM
I grew up in a "high-five" kind of family. Actually, sometimes high-five might have been optimistic. We were close and loving, but not physical. I've had to learn a lot as an adult.

That's how I grew up, too. The best we got was an occasional side hug or pat on the back. It was because the church my parents (and my husband and I as well) were raised in did not allow physical interactions. We were required to keep space between us and absolutely no touching whatsoever, not even holding hands at the church-run boarding school we attended. We are both very physically affectionate person so it was a living hell. There are still days it gets to us, when the snuggles aren't just affectionate but desperate needs for physical human contact. I feel more sad about it than anything, especially where my family is concerned. I'm not the only hugger, I'm just the only one who doesn't suppress it.

aspiecat
09-07-2015, 07:47 AM
DH, DS and I are NOT huggy-kissy types. Ooohhh noooo...not at all. We feel awkward when we are approached by family members for hugs and what-not, and we are not overly demonstrative people anyway. However, we are demonstrative towards each other; at least DH and I hug often throughout the day and DS will give me a quick peck on the cheek to thank me for something and to say goodnight.

So I voted for "Plenty of hugs and kisses..." as we are kinda sorta like that towards each other, but OTOH we're not like that in general.

Riceball_Mommy
09-07-2015, 09:56 AM
Hugs are huge here, not so much kisses any more. My daughter is not a fan of kisses so much anymore. I can maybe kiss the top of her head and she'll occasionally kiss my cheek. I will get sought out for hugs though. With everyone else she's not likely to hug. It kind of bothers some of the grandparents but it's up to her who she hugs and she's not big on hugs outside of us parents. Which is really weird to explain in the moment.

Life'sAcademyForTwo
09-08-2015, 10:11 PM
I'm going with plenty, since my 2 boys are growin' up too fast and often forget to give mom a kiss and hug good morning or goodnight. If I'm lucky enough, I'll get a snuggle, surprise hug or kiss (mainly from my youngest 11) during the day. I'm all about the hugs, kisses, snuggles, hand holding, ...
Hubby not so much.

I try to get as much as I can before they move out :`-(

zcat
09-13-2015, 09:18 PM
Talking about you and your kids, spouse, other relatives living in your home.....I'm curious to know how affectionate everyone is in their daily life?

It is hard to choose something for the whole family.
Dh and I kiss, hug and snuggle all the time.
Dd does not like physical affection much. She rarely initiates it and kind of puts up with the occasional hug or pat. She wouldn't do a high five. Kisses are out. She will hold hands occasionally.


We are pretty affectionate, but that is because my husband is and the kids have grown up with him. I am a work in progress. I grew up in a "high-five" kind of family. Actually, sometimes high-five might have been optimistic. We were close and loving, but not physical. I've had to learn a lot as an adult.

I grew up in a family that was not physically affectionate. Even talking about emotions was not okay. It was just kind of understood. I'm more huggy now.

aselvarial
09-13-2015, 09:25 PM
aspiecat, oh that rang doorbells! I am very affectionate with my husband and child (kid doesn't really give you any options, it's hug him or smother), but I have huge personal space issues with other ppl. Which is tough as my husband's family is very very touchy-feely and I'm more.... "lets wave hi". There wasn't a vote option for "affectionate with children and spouse, but not with anyone else".