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Thread: Dating?

  1. #1
    Junior Member Newbie mrsnj's Avatar
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    Feb 2017

    Default Dating?

    OK....I know its a bit early. We haven't even officially started HS. Trying to get my ducks in order right now. But I was thinking on this while getting ready this morning (my private time to usually talk to myself and have a good convo )BUT....if you homeschool teenagers, how would they connect and get a boyfriend/girlfriend? I mean...My daughter is in girl scouts and a girl scout archery team. So clearly that won't be where she finds boys. I am looking into 4h for a few things. But when she is old enough how would she meet up with guys her age and date? Silly question maybe...kinda early to even worry.... but I was just curious. It is kinda part of the social experience. How does your kids do it?

  2. Global Village Forum Post - Jun2018
  3. #2


    My kids are in middle school. We have started to hear a little about crushes and so forth and have known of a couple of homeschool romances among the kids a little older. But our social world includes a lot of co-ed activities and has a lot of overlaps and people we see often, people we see sometimes, people we run into once or twice a year. I assume that when my kids are ready that if they have a mutual crush that they'll be able to have the same sort of dating experiences I had as a teen if they choose to pursue that.
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  4. #3


    10-odd years ago there were no shortages of romantic partners coming in and out of this house from Park day, MySpace (sort of a prehistoric precursor of Facebook/What'sApp but I guess you had to be there and you weren't), the shopping mall, etc.

    Homeschooling isn't a cure for teen hormones.

  5. #4
    Senior Member Evolved Deli76's Avatar
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    Dds friends have brothers. She doesn't see them often, but they all go on google hangouts and talk. This is where checking text and phone history comes in. I try to give dd her space, but how much space...I really don't know. Dd also has co-ed activities and co-op. I think 16 is a good starting age for dating, ALTHOUGHHHHH I would like it to be 30! LOL! And on a serious note, does anyone have stats on teen pregnancy among home schoolers? I always wonder about drug and liqhor use, pregnancy, and gang affilliation among home schoolers. Home schoolers are so different than public schoolers. And quite honestly, dating scares me. It did with ds and I know it will be coming soon with dd. Yikes!
    Bobo 13 yrs old - marches to the beat of her own drum, driven, out going and loud, yet she loves nature
    Booger Boy 21 yrs old - quiet, self assured, confident and laying his own path

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  6. #5


    Quote Originally Posted by Deli76 View Post
    And on a serious note, does anyone have stats on teen pregnancy among home schoolers? I always wonder about drug and liquor use, pregnancy, and gang affiliation among home schoolers. Home schoolers are so different than public schoolers.
    I also would like to see if any statistics on this exist! Honestly, though, they'd probably be done by religious homeschooling groups, sampling religious homeschooling families, so I don't know what we could interpret from that.

    Neither of my kids dated at all through high school, although we let them know going out to a movie or pizza was okay with us. DD is lesbian, so that sort of narrows the field a bit. And she's very shy, so she has yet to date. DS seems too busy with school and friends to bother, honestly. He's shy as well.. If he's like his dad, he won't date until he's 20! They are both on very large college campuses right now, so a potential dating pool is huge. I just don't think the interest is there right now, at least with my son.

    Sooo, no advice from me, I guess.

    Homeschooled two kids for 11 years, now trying to pay it forward

    Daughter (21), a University of Iowa senior triple majoring in English with Creative Writing, Journalism, and Gender, Women's & Sexuality Studies

    Son (20), a Purdue University junior majoring in Computer Science, minoring in math, geology, and history

  7. #6


    We are years away from this, but I will encourage DS to get a job in places where teens usually work around here, (the water park, the bbq place, the drive in, etc). It will widen his social circle, and maybe he'll get a few dates.

    Any place that offers co-ed events where the kids have time to mingle and chat has potential, (local sports, 4h, youth choir/orchestra/band/theater groups, martial arts, cross fit, local gaming/comic book stores, etc).

  8. #7
    Site Admin Arrived Topsy's Avatar
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    Youngest is on the autism spectrum and has never shown overly much interest in any one member of the female of the species, but that may simply be because he's so conscious of his limited social skills and would be afraid of rejection or awkwardness. For our oldest, his first "girlfriend" was completely online. She lived in another state and they met via their homeschool cooperative projects. They "dated" for a year and we made it possible for them to meet IRL twice. It was a good intro to the world of girls, I think. When he was in high school he began doing dual enrollment at the community college and he dated a girl who was also dually enrolled. Co-ops, if available, offer a cool way to meet other teens. We didn't have much in the way of those, but the few we did have were good friend-making, group opportunities. Our boys went on "group dates" with those teens several times.

  9. #8


    Sorry, I can't speak from personal experience yet. My oldest is a little bit young for dating. I think we'll follow the lead of another family which we're friends with. They have a teen daughter who is dating and they have several rules set up. She can only go on group dates, no being in her room with her boyfriend and closing the door, etc. I'll probably be a little more strict and say no taking your boyfriend/girlfriend into your room at all. But then my teen years were very "colorful" and I'd like to spare my kids some of that.

    Honestly, I don't worry much about my kids finding potential dating partners. I've seen older kids in our homeschool group find boyfriends/girlfriends and they don't seem socially deprived. When the time comes mine will figure it out, too.
    Lori B.

    My Blog: Relaxed Homeschooling

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